April 22, 2012

Hey,
Thanks for the photo's! Those are really cool. Except for Riley's facial expression in the picture with Tiadora and it looks like Alyssa has not been reading the For the Strength of Youth pamphlet. But the deck looks awesome. I can't believe you built that, that takes some real skills.
Okay, I want to say this first because it is really important. And I would like it if you guys could email me back ASAP so that I can get your advice and hopefully try to use it this week. I'll come check my email again at the end of p-day for your reply.
Last night we had an hour to kill so we stopped by the Baral's. They let us in, and then it proceeded to be the worst hour of my entire mission. I don't know if I have said much how I feel about them, but they seriously feel like family. I can speak quite a bit of basic Nepalese, they always love to feed us, we have helped Dumbaru stop drinking, we see them like 3 or 4 times a week, and I care about them more than anyone since Ken and Toni. They are our best friends here. So when we went over last night, I was just devastated. They were just fighting non-stop. I think they are too comfortable around us. They had this big family argument while we were there. Dumbaru is still out of a job, and Pratigya is just so resentful about him losing his job due to drinking and how she has to pay all the bills. The kids just fight and quarrel non-stop, and as they live in a one bedroom flat this just wears so much on everyone and the kids are always running off to the bathroom to hide, as it is the only privacy in the flat. The kids don't respect Dumbaru, and Lukas is bigger than Pratigya and she can't really control him. They are just fighting over the dumbest stuff. Dumbaru won't eat the food Pratigya cooks, she is always telling him how bad of a father he is, Dumbaru is trying to change and repent but Pratigya just won't let him. They always interupt each other when they speak. She has so much anger and bitterness built up over the last 10 years. She was crying and whispered that she just wants to be alone. I'm pretty sure I was the only one who heard it. And not like alone just right now, but alone as in she doesn't want to be in this marriage anymore. Elder Pettersen finally just stood up and with tears in his eyes told them how sad he was, and then we left. I couldn't eat last night afterwards. I just had no desire or motivation to account with the district. I just wanted to go to bed. It was pouring rain. Me and Elder Pettersen went outside after I finished accounting and just stood outside in this park in the rain and hail for like an hour without talking. Ken called me, as he always does Sunday nights, and that really helped to cheer me up. I feel fine now, but I still am just at such a loss about what to do with the Baral's. Their marriage and their family just isn't working right now. They are fine at church and when we have other people with us over there, but in reality it is just so dysfunctional. I have no experience with marriage or this sort of thing. I need your guys' help. What should I do? Is there even anything I can do that might help them? This isn't really what missionaries are called to do but I can't let this family fall apart if I can help it.
That is a pretty depressing start to this email. Sorry, I just want you guys to be able to understand more of the situation.

Dad you mentioned that we have been working with the same people for a long time. It is true. At the moment, the only solid people we have are the Baral's. This week we found 5 new investigators. We taught a guy from Egypt who is Christian but lives with a bunch of Muslims, who runs a food stand in the local mall, we taught a lady from Ghana whose husband is a Christian Scientist, we taught a lady we met in the high street from Nigeria who lived in Belgium for quite some time and has her own church, we taught this family in the army who are lapsed Church of England members who we met knocking on an army housing estate, and we taught this other guy from Nigeria who is currently unemployed and never really sure of his schedule. We teach all of these people about the restoration, and get them to read the Book of Mormon. But then it seems like getting that second teach is the real challenge. We have so many one hit wonders here. At the first of my mission I was excited about people like this, but now all I really want to do is find those who are actually elect. I just want to find more people who are searching for and who need this gospel, like the Barals. So the reason I just mention the same people every week is because they are the ones we have found who are elect. I still really do care about these other people we are teaching, but it becomes easier to tell which people are genuine and which are not as time goes on. This week I actually had more teaches then any week of my entire mission. We had 19 teaches this week. Although 8 of them were to less actives/recent converts. And one of the days this week was not a real working day, as we had a zone training meeting all day Friday. So the work here is actually going qutie well, and this might sound bad, but right now I have tunnel vision and all I want to do is help the Baral's and help them to enter the water's of baptism.

I think from now on, sending stuff to the mission office is a much better idea. Although I did get the letter and money grandma sent. I have just had really busy p-days and have not had time to write back yet. I will soon though.
I think Riley made a good choice in doing BLC this summer instead of school. When I get home next summer, I think that I will keep that going. But you and Alyssa might have to do it until July when I get back. And that is awesome you guys dominated that first game. Haha Riley got scored on by girls 4 times. What a joke. And I miss that old Phil snapshot from the point. That shot saved us in quite a few games last year. Who is all on the team this year?
The AP's told me like 5 months ago we weren't allowed to ice skate. But I talked to them again and all it says in the white handbook is that we aren't allowed winter sports. So they said it wasn't like a real rule, it was just how they interpreted winter sports. So they said it was fine and we had a district p-day ice skating. A big reason why we went is because there is a less active part-member family we met last week. And the mom, the only member in the family, works at this skating rink. She is really hard to see and get into contact with, so as the district was there I spent some time talking to her so it was a good chance to get to see her again.
I don't know what this email is going to sound like to you guys. I had one of the best weeks of my mission that ended on such a bad note. I am doing good though. The work here is going forward, and things are going better and better with the ward. We have a few families that I am really starting to feel close to. Although one day on exchange this week, I was with Elder Bethers, a really good missionary who goes home in like 3 weeks. Me and him are both pretty outgoing and talkative. And on this exchange, two different less active ladies we have been working with asked me why Pettersen never talks. So that could be a part of the problem. But after you get to know him he opens up and is a really funny guy.
The other major problem that we have at the moment is the senior couple here. They are out of control. They go see the Barals all the time and just do crazy things. On Friday night they went over there for like 4hours, until 11 oclock at night, and taught the Word of Wisdom, talked about deep resurrection doctrine, about spiritual vs. physical death, and got involved with disciplining the children. When we went over for our teach Saturday  they had no idea what the word of wisdom even was. Like they didn't even know what I was referring to when I asked if the Woods talked about the Word of Wisdom with them. All they could remember was Joseph Smith was chewing tobacco and they aren't allowed to drink tea or coffee anymore. So bad. They also had a meeting with the bishop on Sunday  The Bishop loves the Woods by the way. They had like a family interview with him, and no one would tell us what they were going to be talking about. And then the Bishop invited the Woods to be present at that meeting but not us. This can get frustrating, but at the same time me and Pettersen are able to laugh about it a lot of the time.
They do other crazy things, like they sleep in every morning, they went to watch the new movie battleship in theaters last week, and other stuff. Me and Pettersen always get a laugh out of their latest exploits. They really are a good couple though, they are really nice and we like to be with them but they just are doing some things for the Barals that just seem to be a bit detrimental.
Well I hope you guys have a good week. And hopefully you can think of some ideas of what could help the Baral's.
Love you guys!